Uxorious and Numinous

I wonder if the transcendence of being in love is similar to the luminous experience we have when contemplating our death, or our experiential absence such as before we were born, or had we never been born, or the transcendence of a religious experience. In a way it makes sense because all these moments carry the sort of intense meaning and significance that motivate and power our lives. Very few people want to be their partner’s new religion because it’s not only creepy but inevitably untenable and somewhat dishonest, yet there is something greater than our selves in an intimate relationship. People say the thrill is gone or the magic is gone with good reason, because in a relationship there is a beauty, a je ne sais quoi, an ineffably experienced irruption of meaning when we are at a loss for adequate symbols to express our experience of love even to our own selves.

Yet there are so many men and women who miss out on the transcendence and divinity of love in their relationship, either miss from the beginning because it was never there, or because they merely thought it was, or they confused bodies mating with souls mating (not that there can’t be a confluence), or they had this and somewhere on their journey they lost it, lost their way, lost the path, or lost their interior compass. And having been in some of those lost places, I wonder if perhaps female led relationships work, for those people for whom they work, because the female led dynamic becomes a functionally effective symbol for bringing that transcendence of love and romance into transparent, meaningful and significant clarity.

If the focal points of every existence are our numinous experiences, of any moment experienced as meaningfully sacred, then it makes sense that female led relationships can be an effective way of bringing back the thrill, the magic, the meaning and the romance, the transcendence, the power and the glory, of love.